How to pick up girls in 7 situations: 32 dating coaches share tips
This article was co-authored by our trained team of editors and researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness. There are 14 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the. This article has been viewed 97, times. Learn more Approaching women at the bar can be one of the most anxiety inducing things a person can do. Fear of rejection and the potential for humiliation is an overwhelming thought for many people.
However, by following specific steps and techniques, you can build your self esteem and begin to approach women at bars with confidence. When you want to strike up a conversation with a woman at a bar, start by making eye contact and smiling at her. Look for als such as her smiling back and responding with open body language to see if she seems interested. If the als are encouraging, approach her casually and say hello. Break the ice with a friendly introduction or a quick joke, then offer to buy her a drink and sit down next to her to chat.
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How to pick up girls in clubs and bars – the ultimate guide
Smile, and see if she smiles back.
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All smiles are not created equal. People smile more often when they see someone they find attractive. Read her body language. Are her arms crossed, is she avoiding eye contact, or pointing away from you? These are all s that she is not interested.
Walk up to her in a non-threatening manner and introduce yourself. This can disgust them, and ruin your chances of talking to them for the rest of the night.
Instead, approach her so she can see you, and maintain a smile as you walk up to her. Do not walk directly towards her like you have a mission. Instead walk in her direction, but make approaching her seem natural and not forced. A good excuse to begin a conversation is to talk over drinks. Always make sure to ask her what kind of drink she wants before buying one. If she refuses and seems uncomfortable, you should walk away. Not all girls want to talk.
Stay in touch
Sit next to her and try to find common interests. Take a seat next to her if she accepts the drink and it seems like she wants to talk.
Try to find common interests. Practice the technique wherever you go.
Practicing these techniques outside of a bar or club situation is ideal because it will acclimate you to doing it in low-stress situations. Try out this method at the grocery store, shopping mall, or in school in order to meet new friends. Trying it out in a low-stress situation to a woman that you aren't interested in will allow you to practice without fearing rejection. Method 2 of Introduce yourself to the group of girls. Even if you only like one girl in the group, ignoring or dismissing her friends will often make them angry at you or make you seem like a jerk.
It's okay to change who you target if you meet someone more interesting or attractive that's in the group. Just make sure that you aren't sending als to more than one girl or problems may arise. What do you girls think? If they go for the hug, reciprocate it. Be the life of the party and buy her and her friends drinks. If you can make a good impression on her friends, it will make you look a lot better to the girl that you have your eyes on.
Also, in some circles it is considered tacky to buy one girl a drink but then ignore her friends. Refrain from being mean to any of her friends.
Try to go out of your way to pay her special attention, but never do it in an aggressive way. When you are talking to her friends, make sure to compliment her, specifically, in a non-sexual way.
If there is a lull in the conversation, or people break off into individual groups, take your chance to speak with her one on one. Method 3 of Expect only to have a fun night out. For those that suffer from social anxiety, it might be therapeutic to meet new people. Concentrate on your own happiness, not approaching women. For some people, hyper-social situations like bars or clubs overwhelm them. If you are like this, then try ing a hiking group or a local sports club before diving into the bar scene.
Never expect to get intimate when going out and meeting girls. Extenuating circumstances like an existing ificant other, may cause the woman to not want to speak with you.
How to approach a girl at a bar offers an interesting dynamic
Feel confident that being yourself is good enough. Having positive thinking and keeping a positive self image will help you build confidence. Breathing slower and relaxing your neck and shoulder muscles can also help you with your confidence. Don't force things or feel defeated. There will be some nights where no women you approach will be receptive to talking to you.
In these cases, don't get desperate and start going for whoever is in front of you. Instead, relax, and realize that you won't be successful every single night. Instead of getting upset, go home and do something you really like or get take-out at your favorite restaurant.
Never insult anyone if you're having a hard time talking to women. This will only make you come off as a jerk, and will likely ruin your chances of talking to a woman for the rest of the night. You can meet people at the grocery store, park, or school if you have a limited budget.
Submit a Tip All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published. Related wikiHows How to. How to. More References 5. About This Article. Co-authored by:. Co-authors: 9. Updated: September 10, : Getting a Date. Article Summary X When you want to strike up a conversation with a woman at a bar, start by making eye contact and smiling at her.